What About Sons?

So I was listening to the radio today, and that John Mayer song "Daughters" came on. Now, when that song first came out in 2004 I thought, "Wow, cool song Johnny. Way to make a statement."

But, when I came upon it today, and really listened to the lyrics I sort of took offense. Not in the sense that I'm a girl, and a daughter, but rather that I'm the mother of a son. I mostly agree with what Johnny has to say about fathers treating their daughters well. I mean of course I agree. Fathers should definitely not walk out on their daughters, it will totally mess them up.

But, then he goes into his bridge which is as follows:
Boys, you can break
You'll find out how much they can take
Boys will be strong
And boys soldier on
But boys would be gone without the warmth from
A woman's good, good heart

 Now let's look at what these lyrics imply. Apparently fathers can push their sons to the breaking point and they will be fine, but deprive them of a woman's love and they just die. So, you can see my frustration being the mom of a son.

Let's talk about what really happens to a son when his father walks out on him, or perhaps even worse, is physically present but lacks any ability to actually be "present". I know a man who had a fantastically terrible father. He was an alcoholic, taking him and his older brother, at ages of approximately 3 and 6, to parties where he would proceed to get ass drunk, pass out, and leave his SONS to fend for themselves with his "buddies".

Now according to Mr. Mayer, those boys were broken, but they soldiered on and now they are fine because they have the "warmth from a woman's good, good heart." Their mother did everything she could, but you had better bet that those boys, sons, were totally messed up.

It is a miracle of God that those boys, sons, learned how to be wonderful men. Neither one of them is an alcoholic. Both are fantastic fathers to their sons, and husbands to their wives. But you had better believe they both have some pretty messed up baggage due to the unforgivable nature of their father.

But let's not forget. What Johnny says....
Boys, you can break
You'll find out how much they can take
Boys will be strong
And boys soldier on
But boys would be gone without the warmth from
A woman's good, good heart

So that's where it came from!

Now I wouldn't say I'm naive. But apparently, I've had my head up my ass for some time.

I was reading Parent's magazine from last month, and in it was an article about the amount of mercury in the fish we eat. I always knew there was mercury in fish, however I did not even think about how it got there.

I always thought it was just one of those things that appeared naturally in fish. I did know that the bigger the fish, the more mercury since it builds up from all the other fish they eat.

I WAS WRONG.

So apparently, when the pollution floating around the air settles in the ocean, it is absorbed and ingested by the fish in the sea.

Now it is evident that the toxins in the air, do to our factories and cars and the like, not only poison our lungs, but also the fish we eat.

Awesome.

Thinking of joining these people... http://www.momscleanairforce.org/

Reaching Milstones... Maybe

Now, I realize by typing this I am probably jinxing us, but I'm going to share it anyway because this blog is dedicated to all things Gideon and Mommy, and this is a big Gideon.

Gideon has gone poop twice in his little potty. Now, had I not listened to anyone he probably wouldn't have gone in a potty yet. I was fully convinced he would not (and he still may not) be potty trained until he was at least 3. He has never cared about having a soiled diaper. So, I thought it would be extremely difficult to train him.

One of my aunts bought him a little potty for Christmas, along with a potty book, and some Pull-Ups. I laughed when I opened it thinking surely we wouldn't need any of the above for at least another year.

That brings us to the last few months. Our family has been talking about how they think he's ready to start thinking about using the toilet. I thought yeah, yeah, whatever. Then D was thinking the same thing, and I was like, Ok maybe. Then the doctor asked about it at his 2 year check up the other day and he said he might be ready soon. So then I'm thinking, hmmm.....

So I decide, maybe we will bring the potty out and let him sit on it and start thinking about it. Then the day came last week. He said, like he always does, "I'm poopting!"

So, I jumped on it and said, "Ok, let's sit on your potty."

He sat on it and he totally pooped in the potty! Then we took it in the bathroom and dropped it in the toilet and flushed it down.

Life went on as normal... No other potty business.... Until today. We got home this afternoon and lo and behold he needs to poopie again. He sat on the potty and went poopie!

So that makes twice in one week that he has gone poop in the potty. Fingers are crossed!

The Post-Baby Bathing Suit Conundrum

We are steadily approaching summer. In fact, here in Southern California, we have been in and out of Summer since around March (don't hate us, that's just the nature of things here, mostly due to global warming probably...)

This brings up the topic of whether my body is ready to be strutting around in a bikini. Before I had Gideon I was a definite two-piecer. I wore my bikini with pride, around pools and on beaches alike. And, if I'm being honest, I think I looked pretty dang good.

Let's talk about self-confidence, and what happens to a woman's sense of it before, during, and after having a child. If I'm talking about myself, my confidence in my appearance has been pretty good all around. I don't think I'm ugly. I don't think I'm God's gift to all men, but I don't think I'm hard to look at either. I have no illusions that every man I pass thinks, "Daaaang! She got it goin' on. I'd like to tap that!" But I'd like to think that maybe there are one or two that have thought that about me.

Now, I managed to loose all 45 pounds (thank you very much) of my pregnancy weight gain after having Gideon. But I found, that even though I fit into all my old clothes, again, at first they just didn't fit me the same way. Thus, my bathing suits, even those that were one piece, didn't fit the same. So my search for a new suit last summer, was strictly one piece. I did try on one two piece, and quickly regretted it.

However, I have noticed over the span of a year, my body has started to look and feel more familiar to me. Of course I still have saggy boobs from nursing, and the flabby tummy from the stretching of the skin, and some minimal stretch marks, but the clothes fit! Which brings me back to my bathing suit issue. While I am not 100% confident in wearing a bikini, I think a two piece with higher bottoms, and a slightly bigger top, would be a good segue into two-piece wearing.

Here are some really cute suits:
Black and White polka dot
Red and White polka dot
All Black Two Piece
Black And White Two Piece High Waisted
Red & White Polka Dot Two Piece

There is some part of me that thinks it's a little weird when moms wear tiny little bikinis, so I probably won't ever do that. But, never say never.

What do you do? Have you strayed completely from two-pieces? Do you wear your thong bikini with your children with pride?

Love For Boys

Today, I am trying to keep away from any images of Boston, but it's hard with the amount of social media we are all surrounded with. I've heard enough about it on the radio, and from co-workers to make enough pictures in my head.

In other news, Gideon's 2nd birthday is in one month and I have officially done ZERO planning. Uh oh.... and yet I'm totally not worried. We'll be parkin' it. As is party at the park with family....

Also, I found this from a blog I read. Really good insight for all of us who have boys. Not that it can't impact you if you don't have boys. But I encourage those who have boys to read and think about how to embrace a sensitive side of your son. If your son is anything like mine, he inherently loves "boy" things. Cars, trucks, trains, anything that moves or makes noise. He runs, jumps, climbs. He does other things you wish he wouldn't like hit, kick, scream. You probably dress him in "boy" clothes too. Maybe your son doesn't have long hair... but mine does. And when people call him a girl, I usually don't say anything to correct them because frankly it's a waste of my time. Anyway, if you feel so inclined take a peak...
http://www.girlsgonechild.net/2013/04/we-need-to-allow-men-to-be-sensitive.html

In the mean time....

I am the ghost blogger apparently. I guess I have trouble being dedicated to this blog. And as I am starting a new blog, I suspect my writing will become more sparse... if that's even possible!

I think it's because the check ups have become more spread apart. The next doctor visit isn't until the 2 year mark. Which is approaching rather quickly. D and I were just reminiscing about how this time last year Gideon was just starting walking, and talking.

Now, one month away from two (IknowIcan'tevenhandleitdon'teventalkaboutit) he's not just walking and saying words he's running, jumping, saying sentences, telling stories, counting, and generally cracking us up.

I mean, I know I'm partial, but this kid is awesome. He's hilarious.

Of course, nearing two brings other things.... melt-downs, tantrums, time outs, lots of crying and screaming. I keep trying to remind myself that he's just learning his boundaries, and asserting his wants, likes, and dislikes. But I wish he could do those things without the whining. Man, I can't stand the whining.

I have to say though, I still think he's awesome...

In other news, I'm hippifying my life even more. I've always tried to take the "all natural" route when it comes to my body. We started cutting out all the meat from our diet. I'll say we have vegetarian tendencies, but we aren't 100% veggie. In good conscience I can't buy and consume beef, chicken, and pork unless I know where it came from, how it was raised and subsequently slaughtered. We're buying organic, which we mostly always did. We are buying local. We're eating only truly sustainable fish. Staying away from the dreaded GMO's (how did that measure not pass by the way?). And now I'm taking it to another level.

For years we've used only all natural, plant based bar soap. D and I both switched to all natural deodorants without aluminum, which admittedly does not do a great job at keeping the stink away. And now I am using the "No Poo" method of hair care. I read about it probably a year ago, and just recently decided to try it, and let me tell you there is absolutely no difference in the appearance of my hair. It looks and smells clean. I also took the advice of my estetician and am using coconut oil as a moisturizer, and I also use it in my hair to calm the frizzies instead of using products with chemicals. I'm feeling great, and I don't think I look too crazy!