Lately I have been seriously entertaining the thought that one child is enough. This thought process began right after Gideon was born simply due to the pain of labor. Since that time, however, it has escalated to be more of a parenting preference than out of the burden of offspring.
I, as with many other parents, was asked immediately after Gideon was born, when not if we would have more children. It was never "if", it was always "how many". The more I read, the more common I find this type of comment.
At first, as I said, I didn't want to go through labor again. But since then I went from not being able to function without sleep for another 6 months- God knows how long, to not wanting to have to balance love and affection, funds, etc. on more than one child.
I've read several articles about pros and cons of having an only child. Apparently, these families of three are becoming more common. Women having only one child has gone from somewhere below 20% to over 20% in the last ten years. Many studies now are also showing that the stereotypes of "onlies" (not my term) are not always accurate. In fact many only children have higher IQ's and achieve more in school, and are closer with their parents. What more could I want than a genius child who worships me?
That said, there are also plenty of reasons why having more kids is beneficial. But, it seems to me that the only person it benefits is the current child. Most of the "pros" have been things like having a life long friend, or having someone to help take care of the parents when they're old. How does that benefit me?
Needless to say the debate is still going on in my head. I am completely torn. Having one child is hard enough financially, emotionally, and physically (you don't even want to know what my boobs look like), to think about doing it all over again is a bit daunting.
Here are some of the most helpful articles I've read in case you are interested:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2009/mar/15/single-child-families - You'll have to get beyond the UK slang.
http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/01/29/whats-wrong-with-having-one-child/
http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/AmericanFamily/story?id=2178396&page=1#.UD2XqcFlTeg
http://www.bellybelly.com.au/child/one-child-families-advantages-disadvantages-of-having-one-child
I don't know if it would help at all but I could give you some good reasons that having more then 1 is awesome (selfish good reasons) :) Let me know if you want it.
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